Fate/Squeeze Order is like someone took your old Fate/stay night artbooks, spilled horny all over them, then decided “yeah ok, this is fine” and hit upload. It does not pretend to be deep. You show up, you click, and suddenly you are staring at familiar heroines with tits that look one patch away from their own gravitational field. The game leans hard into that big boobs fantasy, like every servant got buffed in the chest stat and nothing else. If you ever looked at a Fate/Grand Order card and thought, “why is that cleavage not wrapped around a cock right now?”, this thing is very clearly made for you. The plot is basically a flimsy excuse to get Fate girls on their knees or pushing their boobs together, and honestly it fits the series better than it should.
One thing that hit me first: the CGs feel like those fanbooks on Booth or Melonbooks where the artist is obviously a Fate nerd who has studied panel layouts from manga, then said screw pacing, I just want to draw titjobs. You get that “doujin event table” vibe, rough around the edges, some faces slightly off model, but the energy is horny and direct. No slow burn, you’re in boobjob territory ridiculously fast. There is this scene where the MC’s cock is basically lost between a pair of massive tits, only the tip poking out near the collarbone, and the expression on the girl looks almost too proud, like she’s min-maxing her chest build. Nice touch with the cum shots too, sometimes dripping between the boobs, sometimes all over the face like a gacha roll that finally went right. The art is not consistent from CG to CG, you can kinda feel where the artist rushed, but that messy vibe matches the parody tone. It honestly reminded me of those Fate parody manga where Saber is drawn slightly chubby in one panel and perfectly sharp the next, and you just roll with it because the jokes and the fanservice carry everything. Still annoyed the background UI font looks like something from an old Android PDF reader app, but whatever, I stopped caring halfway through the second titjob scene.
Story wise, it plays like someone speedran through Fate canon on YouTube at 2x speed, took half-remembered notes in Google Keep, then wrote a script while jerking off. Names are there, references fly around, but timelines and lore are totally cooked in the best shitpost way. Fate/Grand Order singularities? Yeah sure, except now the main quest is to “correct history” by squeezing legendary big tits and using a big cock as some kind of stupid magic catalyst. Completely ridiculous. Also kind of perfect. One moment you’re in a scene that feels like a straight-up CG rip from the original VN, next moment the same heroine is grinding her boobs on the shaft, talking in slightly broken “Master, your mana is filling my chest” lines that sound like they were translated on DeepL then edited by a horny teenager. Sometimes it works, sometimes it feels clunky as hell, but I still clicked “next” like a degenerate. I kept thinking “ok just one more scene to check the art quality” while knowing damn well I was not checking the art quality. There is one thing I want to complain about forever: the way one of the routes cuts away right when you expect a proper clean-up shot, it just jumps to a different angle without showing the dripping mess you were clearly promised. Whoever did that, I hope your favorite SSR never spooks you again. Anyway, it is crude, it is horny, it is Fate with giant tits wrapped around a cock every few screens. Not subtle. Not careful. Weirdly easy to keep clicking.
Added: Sep 01, 2024
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